Parenting Perspective 

Sibling teasing that emerges during moments of praise often stems from underlying comparison anxiety—a quiet fear that parental love or recognition is a limited resource. When one child is commended for their effort, another may feel left out or inferior, leading them to use jokes or mockery as a defence mechanism to mask their discomfort. The primary goal is not simply to silence them, but to reshape the family’s entire emotional tone around respectful, shared celebration. 

Beginning with Clear Emotional Ground Rules 

Gather your children and set firm, clear expectations. Use calm, steady authority rather than correctional anger, as children respond best to assurance. You might say, ‘In our family, we actively lift each other up. We do not make fun of someone’s pace because every single person learns and grows differently.’ 

Subsequently, highlight what dedicated effort looks like in each individual child. For example, say, ‘Your brother tries again and again until he grasps it. That quality is brave,’ or, ‘You are quick to understand, so you have the ability to help him learn.’ The core message becomes: every strength has a valued place, and every pace is honoured and respected. 

Reframing the Idea of Praise Itself 

When you commend one child, intentionally invite inclusion by expanding the reflection to everyone: 

• ‘I appreciate how each of you works differently—some think deeply and methodically, while others move fast and decisively.’ 

• ‘This week, I observed both of you applying great effort in your own, unique ways.’ 

This approach prevents a single child from being placed on a pedestal while the others are made to feel like silent, watching spectators. 

Teaching Empathy Through Perspective Taking 

When one child attempts to mock another, do not merely issue a command to ‘Stop that.’ Instead, ask privately, ‘How would you genuinely feel if someone laughed when you were struggling to learn something?’ Allow the child time to articulate their discomfort. Empathy is not taught through lectures; it is built through guided reflection and carefully constructed mirrors of experience. 

You could even turn this into a gentle, constructive sibling challenge: ‘Your shared task this week is to find one specific, good thing to say about each other’s genuine effort.’ When praise is actively turned into a shared, reciprocal act, rivalry slowly but surely turns into mutual pride. 

Praising the Unity, Not the Hierarchy 

Whenever siblings are observed encouraging, assisting, or showing patience toward one another, acknowledge it instantly and sincerely. ‘That was truly kind of you to help your sister with that difficult task,’ when said at the right moment, is far more powerful and lasting than any lengthy lecture about general respect. This action clearly signals that kindness and unity, not superiority or speed, are the qualities that earn positive attention in your home. 

A key micro action: maintain a small ‘family growth jar’ where any member can drop an anonymous note describing a time when a sibling showed patience, demonstrable kindness, or helped someone learn a skill. Reading these notes aloud weekly makes genuine growth a visibly shared family celebration. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islamic teaching strongly elevates humility and compassion, constantly reminding believers that the true measure of worth is rooted not in speed or skill, but in the sincerity of intention and the steadfastness of perseverance.¹ When siblings engage in mockery or comparison, they fail to grasp that both knowledge and ability are unique gifts distributed by Allah Almighty with perfect wisdom and design. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Zukhruf (43), Verse 32: 

‘Is it they who distribute the mercy of your Sustainer? We (Allah Almighty) distribute between them their livelihood in the worldly life; and We promoted some of them over others in ranks, so that some of them can be of service to each other; and the mercy of your Sustainer is much better than what they accumulate.’ 

This verse gently yet firmly teaches us that every difference—be it intellectual, physical, or emotional—is an intentional part of the divine design. A fast learner and a slow learner are both equally recipients of Allah’s mercy in distinct forms. Parents can powerfully use this verse to show their children that mocking another’s God given ability is, in profound truth, subtly mocking what Allah Almighty has wisely and justly distributed. 

It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, Hadith 2564, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘It is enough evil for a man to look down upon his Muslim brother.’ 

This Hadith directly addresses the heart of sibling mockery and disdain. It teaches children that belittling another’s effort, even if it is meant in jest, is spiritually harmful and entirely unacceptable. The powerful opposite action—actively lifting a sibling’s confidence and showing respect—is an act deeply loved by Allah Almighty. 

When families successfully build a culture where sincere effort is respected and inherent differences are gracefully accepted, children learn to view one another not as constant competitors, but as cherished companions on the same path of spiritual and worldly growth. Over time, the home genuinely becomes a place where praise unites instead of divides—where even the slowest learner feels authentically seen, and the fastest learner feels a clear, loving responsibility to uplift, not ridicule.