Parenting Perspective 

Children who feel depressed or hopeless often carry their heavy burden in silence. The core emotion beneath this struggle is usually fear—fear of being judged, of causing worry, or of disappointing you. Your role as a parent is to create a space where their honesty is always met with calm, empathy, and unwavering support, showing them that sharing is safe. 

Listen First, Respond Second 

Your first step is to prioritise listening over trying to fix the problem. When a child hints at sadness, pause and simply acknowledge their pain: ‘I hear you, and I want to understand what is going on inside you.’ Avoid jumping to solutions, as this can make them withdraw. Simply sitting beside them quietly signals that their experience matters. This is about witnessing their pain. 

Share Your Own Vulnerabilities 

Children often internalise the idea that adults are always strong. By gently sharing age-appropriate moments when you felt anxious or sad, you can normalise these emotional struggles. Saying, ‘I remember feeling very overwhelmed once, and it helped me to talk to someone I trusted,’ shows that admitting vulnerability is a sign of strength, not weakness. 

Create Low-Pressure Check-ins 

Instead of waiting for a dramatic confession, integrate casual emotional check-ins into your daily routines. A short, non-intrusive question like, ‘How has your heart been feeling today?’ can encourage reflection without triggering their defences. When you celebrate even small admissions of feeling down, you reinforce that expressing inner struggles strengthens your trust. 

Signal Unconditional Support 

Ensure your child knows, without a doubt, that sharing their emotions will not lead to punishment or judgement. Phrases like, ‘Thank you for telling me. I am here with you no matter what,’ should be repeated until they are internalised. You can reinforce this tonight by carving out five quiet minutes to ask about their feelings, ending with, ‘Whatever you feel is okay, and I am always here for you.’ 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam honours the full spectrum of the human experience, recognising our emotional struggles while always emphasising hope and the importance of seeking support. Encouraging a child to speak about their feelings of depression aligns perfectly with the Islamic principle of relying on Allah while also taking proactive steps to seek help. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Baqarah (2), Verse 286: 

‘Allah (Almighty) does not place any burden on any human being except that which is within his capacity…’ 

This verse can remind a child that even the heaviest emotional weights they feel are ultimately within their capacity to manage. It reframes seeking support—through prayer, reflection, and conversation, as a healthy and necessary part of coping within the divine plan. 

It is recorded in Riyadh Al Saliheen, Hadith 237, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Help your brother, whether he is an oppressor or he is oppressed.’ 

While this hadith addresses broader social ethics, its principle extends deeply into family dynamics. Offering support to a family member in distress is a spiritual duty. By listening to and standing with your child in their vulnerability, you embody this prophetic teaching, showing them that our faith honours compassionate presence. 

By fostering consistent and non-judgemental dialogue, you communicate to your child that sharing their inner pain is an act of courage, not weakness. They learn that your love and their faith are constants, and that even in moments of despair, hope, understanding, and divine support are always accessible.