Parenting Perspective 

Mistakes are an Opportunity to Grow 

Helping your child to forgive themselves and move forward is crucial in teaching them emotional resilience, self-compassion, and personal growth. You can start by explaining that making mistakes is a natural part of life and that Allah Almighty is always ready to forgive those who turn to Him in repentance. You might say, ‘Everyone makes mistakes, and it is okay to feel bad about them. What matters is that you learn from them and move forward.’ This helps your child to understand that they are not defined by their mistakes. 

Reflect and Reframe 

Encourage your child to reflect on their mistake and to understand why it happened but remind them not to dwell on their guilt. You can help them to reframe the situation by saying, ‘What did you learn from this mistake? How can we do better next time?’ This teaches your child to view their mistakes as learning opportunities rather than as sources of shame. 

Seek Forgiveness and Move Forward 

Teach your child the importance of seeking forgiveness from Allah and of making amends where it is necessary. Encourage them to say Istighfar (seek forgiveness) and to trust in Allah’s mercy. You could say, ‘When you make mistakes, turn to Allah and ask for His forgiveness. He is the Most Merciful and is always ready to forgive those who seek it sincerely.’ You can help your child to focus on moving forward by setting new goals or by developing positive habits. Praise them for their efforts to improve and let them know that taking responsibility and seeking to do better is what truly matters. 

Spiritual Insight 

In Islam, seeking forgiveness from Allah and forgiving oneself is a way of embracing Allah’s mercy and moving forward in life. Allah Almighty reminds us in the noble Quran at Surah Al Tawbah (9), Verse 104: 

‘Are they not aware that indeed, it is Allah (Almighty) Who has the power to accept the repentance of His servants… and indeed, Allah (Almighty) is the One Who is the Greatest Exonerator and the Most Merciful.’ 

This verse highlights Allah’s infinite mercy and His readiness to forgive those who turn to Him with sincerity. 

The holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ also emphasised the importance of self-forgiveness and turning to Allah. It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 6594, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Truthfulness leads to righteousness, and righteousness leads to Paradise.’ 

This Hadith teaches us that honesty, repentance, and forgiveness are essential components of personal growth. By teaching your child to forgive themselves and to seek forgiveness from Allah, you are helping them to align with the Islamic values of self-compassion, accountability, and spiritual growth.