Parenting Perspective 

Stay True to Your Values 

Helping your daughter to feel strong in mixed gatherings involves building her self-confidence and teaching her the importance of holding onto her values, even when she is surrounded by people who may have different views or behaviours. You can start by explaining to her that it is okay to feel nervous or out of place sometimes, but that she can always rely on her inner strength and self-respect. You might say, ‘In any gathering, it is important to stay true to who you are and to remember the values we believe in. You are strong, and you do not need to change to fit in with others.’ 

It is helpful to praise her for handling mixed-gender situations with grace and respect, as this reinforces that she is strong for maintaining her values in such environments. ‘I am proud of you for being so respectful and confident in that gathering. You showed your strength by staying true to yourself.’ 

Modesty and Kindness are Strengths 

Finally, you can reassure her that modesty, kindness, and respect are strengths that will always shine, no matter the setting. ‘True strength is in how you behave, how you treat others, and how you stay true to your values, not in how you blend in with the crowd.’ 

Spiritual Insight 

In Islam, modesty, respect, and strength of character are paramount in all situations, whether in mixed-gender environments or otherwise. Allah Almighty says in the noble Quran at Surah Al Ahzaab (33), Verse 59: 

‘O Prophet (Muhammad ﷺ upon whom have been conveyed the secret codes of existential realities) , say to your wives, and your daughters and the women who are believers; to cover themselves (fully) with their (outer) garments; this is more appropriate, in order that they are recognised (as chaste women) and not harmed; and (as always) Allah (Almighty) is Most Forgiving and Most Merciful.’ 

This verse shows that our strength comes from maintaining modesty and respect for ourselves and for others. 

The holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ also demonstrated the strength of character in mixed gatherings by treating everyone with kindness and respect. It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 3587, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ stated: 

‘The best of you are those who are the best to their families.’ 

By teaching your daughter to remain true to her values and to behave respectfully in mixed gatherings, you are helping her to live in accordance with these Islamic values of dignity, respect, and modesty.