Parenting Perspective 

Daily chores often generate tension because children sense the emotional climate before the task itself. The emotional core here is anticipation of conflict and pressure: even the thought of a simple task can trigger resistance if children expect criticism, comparison, or shouting. Parents’ own stress amplifies this, creating a feedback loop where everyone approaches chores defensively. Reducing tension requires both emotional calibration and practical structure, turning chores from a battleground into a shared, predictable part of daily life. 

Start with Empathy and Naming Feelings 

Acknowledge the underlying emotions before assigning tasks: ‘I can see that cleaning up feels tiring and frustrating right now.’ Validation does not remove responsibility but signals that their feelings are recognized. This ritual opens dialogue, releases pent-up frustration, and sets a calmer tone. 

Clarify Expectations and Rotate Tasks 

Ambiguity fuels tension. Make roles and timing explicit: ‘Today, you will tidy the bedrooms, and your sibling will wash the dishes. Tomorrow, we switch.’ Using rotation ensures fairness and prevents resentment. Narrate the purpose behind the chores: ‘We are all helping so our home stays comfortable for everyone.’ When children see that chores are equitable and purposeful, resistance often diminishes. 

Encourage Teamwork and Small Celebrations 

Frame chores as collaborative, not individual battles. Work alongside your children when possible, or pair them up for short tasks. Reflect afterwards: ‘Look how quickly we finished together and how nice the room feels.’ Small acknowledgements of effort, rather than perfection, help children connect the act with satisfaction and cooperation, reinforcing a sense of shared achievement rather than conflict. 

Micro-Action to Try 

A micro-action could be a short “check-in moment” before chores: ask each child to state one thing they find annoying about the task and one thing they are willing to try. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam emphasises patience, equity, and sincere effort in daily responsibilities. When children experience chores as fair, structured, and purposeful, they internalise values of discipline, cooperation, and moral growth. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Baqarah (2), Verse 286: 

‘Allah (Almighty) does not place any burden on any human being except that which is within his capacity…’ 

This verse reminds us that tasks should be scaled reasonably and approached with awareness of capacity and effort, nurturing resilience rather than stress. 

It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 1970, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said:  

 ‘Do those deeds which you can do easily, as Allah will not get tired (of giving rewards) till you get bored and tired (of performing religious deeds), and the most beloved deed to Allah is the most regular even if it is small.’  

By establishing fairness, providing clarity, and modelling calm, parents teach children that daily chores are manageable, meaningful, and spiritually significant. Tension decreases naturally when the household experiences chores as shared responsibility and a practice of patience under the guidance of Allah Almighty.