Parenting Perspective 

When your child feels small after seeing others’ achievements on social media, they are not being vain—they are simply being human. The digital world is fundamentally designed to highlight perfection and hide struggle, yet children often mistake that curated highlight reel for reality. Their feelings of inadequacy stem from one innocent misunderstanding: they are comparing their full, complex, imperfect life to everyone else’s best five seconds. 

Name the Distortion, Not the Weakness 

Begin with empathy, not immediate correction or critique. You might say, “It hurts to see everyone else looking so successful. It can make you feel like you are not enough.” This validation calms their inner critic. Only then, gently reveal the illusion: “People usually only share their very best moments online. No one posts their doubts, their mistakes, or their lonely nights.” 

This crucial shift helps your child see the screen for what it truly is—a carefully constructed story, not an accurate mirror. It protects their heart without denying their natural longing for recognition. 

Reframe Achievement as Growth, Not Applause 

Guide them to look at success differently. Ask, “What do you think mattered most in their achievement—the photo or the effort it took to get there?” Then, consciously link that focus to their own efforts, however quiet those may be. Say, “Your persistence while nobody was watching also counts fully. Allah Almighty sees that.” 

A micro action: once a week, have your child list one private effort they made—an extra revision, a kind act, or a moment of self control—and sincerely thank them for it. This simple practice teaches them that unseen progress is real progress. 

Limit Passive Scrolling and Add Purpose 

Rather than banning social media outright, help your child learn to use it intentionally. Set small, clear boundaries: scrolling only after homework, consciously following educational or genuinely inspiring pages, or sharing one post that reflects learning rather than comparison. When purpose replaces passivity, online spaces naturally become less harmful and more creative. 

If they agree, you could suggest a short ‘digital sabbath’ once a week—a few hours completely without screens. Replace that time with something grounding like a walk, a focused family meal, or journaling. The goal is not to punish them, but to peacefully return them to reality, where their true worth is felt, not desperately performed. 

Model How to See Beyond Comparison 

Children closely watch how their parents respond to others’ success. Avoid negative remarks about others online or in conversation. Instead, model contentment by saying things like, “That is wonderful for them; everyone has their own time to shine.” When parents speak from a place of abundance, children learn that joy is not a limited resource. 

In time, your calm, steady tone will become their internal compass—the inner voice that says, “Someone else’s light does not dim mine.” 

Spiritual Insight 

Comparison is one of the oldest human struggles. When a believer feels diminished by another’s apparent success, it is not jealousy itself that harms them, but the temporary loss of trust in Allah Almighty’s perfect plan. Islam actively invites us to shift our gaze from what others possess to what Allah Almighty is preparing uniquely for us. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran in Surah Taaha (20), Verse 131: 

‘And do not raise your eyes (in expectation for your Ummah), towards the fact that We (Allah Almighty) have given benefits to some of the groups of (extremists in disbelief) amongst them, the luxuries of this worldly life; (this is so that) We (Allah Almighty) may test them (with these indulgences); and the provisions made by your Sustainer are always better and everlasting.’ 

This verse is a gentle, clear command to actively guard our hearts from envy. It reminds both parent and child that worldly achievements are fundamentally temporary tests, while Allah Almighty’s provision—including unique talent, perfect timing, and bespoke opportunity—is uniquely crafted for each soul. 

It is recorded in Sunan Ibn Majah, Hadith 4142, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘Look at those who are lower than you and do not look at those who are above you, for it is more suitable that you do not belittle the blessings of Allah upon you.’ 

This timeless guidance is the definitive antidote to the digital age’s illusion. Teach your child to practise gratitude immediately after scrolling—to name one specific blessing in their own life. Over time, that small habit successfully retrains the eyes and softens the heart. 

When children learn that their worth was never intended to be measured in likes, ranks, or reposts, they begin to view success as a private, sincere bond between them and Allah Almighty. And when faith securely anchors their sense of identity, no amount of online applause or digital silence can ever make them feel less than whole.