Parenting Perspective 

Normalise Shared Responsibilities 

If your child refuses to do a chore because they think it is not ‘for boys,’ it is important to address this misconception and to reinforce the idea that household responsibilities are not gender specific. You can start by explaining that Islam encourages both boys and girls to contribute to family life and that doing chores is a way of being responsible and supportive. For example, you might say, ‘In Islam, both boys and girls are encouraged to help at home. The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ helped with household chores, and there is no task that is just for one gender.’ 

Focus on Contribution, Not Gender 

Help your child to understand that doing chores is not about gender roles but about contributing to the well-being of the family. Explain that every member of the family, regardless of gender, plays an important role in maintaining the home. ‘Helping with chores teaches us responsibility and shows that we care about others in our family. It is not about being a boy or a girl; it is about being a good person.’ 

Challenge Stereotypes Through Action 

To further challenge these stereotypes, involve your child in a variety of tasks, from cleaning to fixing things, and praise them for their efforts. ‘You are doing a great job helping with the laundry. Everyone in this house has an important role, and I am proud of you for helping out.’ This helps your child to see that contributing to household chores is a valuable and rewarding experience for both boys and girls. 

Spiritual Insight 

In Islam, both boys and girls are encouraged to contribute to household responsibilities, and gender is not a limitation on what tasks one can undertake. Allah Almighty says in the noble Quran at Surah Al Baqarah (2), Verse 286: 

‘Allah (Almighty) does not place any burden on any human being except that which is within his capacity…’ 

This verse highlights that Allah has provided each of us with the strength and capacity to fulfil our responsibilities, and these are not bound by gender. 

The holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ also exemplified helping at home and encouraged both men and women to contribute to family life. It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 3587, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ stated: 

‘The best of you are those who are the best to their families.’ 

This Hadith teaches us that contributing to family life, through both small and significant tasks, is a noble act. By helping your child to understand that chores are a part of their responsibility and show respect, you are guiding them to embrace their role within the family in alignment with the values of Islam.