Parenting Perspective 

Children are constantly surrounded by loud examples of success—medals, awards, and applause. In this environment, quiet, subtle acts of goodness can feel invisible. Yet, these small, unseen efforts—such as sharing a toy, listening patiently, or forgiving a small slight—form the true, resilient heart of character. What you say as a parent can either feed their need for recognition or teach them that Allah Almighty values the unseen just as much as the publicly celebrated. 

1. Using Language That Honours Stillness 

When you witness your child doing something thoughtful but unnoticed by others, give it gentle, quiet attention. 

• Say: ‘I saw what you did, even though no one else did. That was beautiful.’ 

• Say: ‘Sometimes the quietest kindness makes the biggest, most lasting difference in a home.’ 

Such words provide genuine assurance to your child that their goodness has been seen—not for show or performance, but for its sincerity. 

2. Comparing Silence to Light, Not Shadow 

Children sometimes mistakenly believe that quiet actions equate to less importance. Reframe this perspective using powerful, positive metaphors: 

• Say: ‘The sun does not make any noise, but it brightens everything around it.’ 

• Say: ‘The best people do their good quietly, just like the roots that hold a tree strong.’ 

Metaphors like these shape their imagination, making the concept of inner strength feel noble and valuable, not invisible. 

3. Praising Intention, Not Volume 

Instead of the volume-focused ‘That was a big help!’, try: ‘You helped with a good heart and sincere intention.’ By shifting the focus from how much was done to how sincerely it was done, you teach that worth is not measured by external scale. Children learn that even small gestures—such as sharing a pencil or comforting a friend—can hold great meaning when performed sincerely. 

4. Telling Stories Where Small Deeds Change Everything 

Share simple, real life examples that illustrate the ripple effect of small acts: 

• Remind them that the holy Prophet’s smile was counted as charity (sadaqah). 

• Share a story about a family member whose simple act of making soup for a sick neighbour lifted her spirits for the whole day. 

These narratives show that quiet acts ripple outwards significantly. 

A Micro-Action: Each evening, invite your child to recall one quiet act they did or sincerely noticed that day. End the sharing with the simple, firm statement: ‘That mattered.’ This gentle, consistent rhythm trains their heart to recognise sacredness in simplicity. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam profoundly treasures sincerity (ikhlas) above mere show. In the divine balance, it is not the loudness of the deed but the purity of the heart that carries ultimate spiritual weight. Reminding children of this fundamental principle transforms their everyday kindness into genuine worship, and their everyday restraint into quiet strength. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran in Surah Al Baqarah (2), Verse 271: 

‘If you disclose your charitable (donations publicly) then this can be a good (gesture, to encourage others to do the same); but if you keep it private and give it to the poor, then this is also infinitely better for you; and He (Allah Almighty) shall he raise some of your bad deeds from your (recorded register); and Allah (Almighty) is All Cognisant of everything that you do.’ 

This verse beautifully highlights the spiritual truth that hidden goodness holds a special closeness to Allah Almighty. It teaches children that quietness and modesty in good actions is not a sign of weakness—it is, in fact, a mark of deep sincerity. 

It is recorded in Sahih Bukhari, Hadith 6464, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

‘The most beloved of deeds to Allah are those done consistently, even if they are small.’ 

This hadith reinforces that small, steady acts carry immense spiritual value. When children hear this, they begin to understand that true greatness is not found in attention or applause, but in devotion—in doing what is right, again and again, quietly and faithfully. 

When parents use words that intentionally lift the hidden over the loud, children grow into genuine doers, not performers. They learn to act primarily out of conscience, not out of curiosity for praise. Over time, they internalise that every quiet act leaves a lasting mark in the unseen world—a world where Allah Almighty sees, records, and rewards every sincere intention, no matter how small it may initially seem.