Parenting Perspective 

Seeing Overload, Not Just Behaviour 

When your child becomes loud, restless, or intentionally disruptive after experiencing sensory overload—spinning, shouting, or creating chaos just to gain attention—what they are truly seeking is regulation through connection. Their brain is struggling to process too much noise, light, or stimulation, and your calm presence must serve as their anchor. Responding with scolding or excessive control will often heighten the chaos, whereas regulated empathy and predictable structure can successfully guide them back to balance. 

Sensory overwhelm frequently looks exactly like defiance, but it is fundamentally an expression of distress. The child’s nervous system is flooded, and they are attempting to discharge this excess energy or regain a sense of control by compelling others to join their state. Recognise the early cues, which include: 

• Excessive fidgeting. 

• A raised or strained voice. 

• Darting eyes. 

• Frantic, over-the-top laughter. 

Instead of asking, “Why are you acting like this?”, state calmly, “It looks like everything feels too loud right now. Let us find calm together.” Naming their internal experience in this way lowers their adrenaline levels and initiates the process of co-regulation. 

Lower the Stimulation First 

The first essential step is not a lecture, but the immediate reduction of sensory input. Dim the lights, move away from crowds, turn off screens, or gently escort them to a quieter space. Crucially, lower your own tone and slow your pace of movement. Your slower, more measured breathing cues safety to their overstimulated brain. Sometimes, silence is more therapeutic than sentences; simply standing nearby, calm and grounded, is the initial form of intervention. 

Use Grounding Tools 

Teach effective grounding techniques through their senses. You might ask them to: ‘Name three things you can see, two things you can touch, one thing you can hear.’ Alternatively, offer something physical to engage their body—this could be deep pressure hugs, a weighted toy, or a gentle hand squeeze. Movement, such as gentle jumping or squeezing playdough, helps release physical tension safely. When the body calms, the disruptive behaviour will naturally follow. 

Connect Before Correct 

Once your child has settled even slightly, kneel down to their level and validate their feelings gently: ‘That was overwhelming for you. I completely understand.’ Only after this validation should you introduce a boundary: ‘We can play later, but shouting now hurts everyone’s ears.’ Correcting the behaviour too soon will re-trigger their defensive response. Connection first builds the necessary trust; trust then allows effective redirection. 

Plan Predictable Recovery Routines 

After every busy or noisy environment (such as school events, family gatherings, or supermarkets), plan a dedicated decompression ritual. This could be quiet time, soft music, performing an act of worship, or drawing. Explain the necessity simply: ‘After lots of noise, our bodies need quiet time to reset.’ Predictable rhythms prevent future meltdowns by showing the child that recovery is an expected part of the routine, not something they will be punished for seeking. 

Reward Self-Awareness, Not Just Calm 

When your child independently utilises coping strategies, such as asking for quiet or moving away from the source of stimulation, praise them specifically: ‘You noticed it was too loud, and you took space. That is strong self-control.’ This builds their emotional literacy and effectively teaches them that open communication, not chaos, is the most reliable way to earn your attention. 

Spiritual Insight 

In Islam, inner peace (sakinah) is understood to be a profound sign of divine mercy. When your child spirals into sensory chaos, your critical role is to become a source of sakinah—a composed calm that settles the heart. Teaching a child how to transition from noise to stillness is not just effective emotional regulation; it is an act of spiritual education. It guides them to understand that tranquillity is the state where Allah Almighty’s presence is most deeply and clearly felt. 

Qur’anic Reflection 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Ra’ad (13), Verse 28: 

‘Those people who are believers, and attain serenity of their hearts with the remembrance of Allah (Almighty); indeed, it is only with the remembrance of Allah (Almighty) that one can (and does) find peace of mind and heart.’ 

This verse serves as a powerful reminder that genuine inner calm comes not from forcefully controlling the external world, but from remembrance (dhikr) within us. When your child seeks chaos, they are searching for that rest, but they are seeking it in the wrong place. Your gentle voice, your patient du‘a (supplication), and your consistent presence help steer their heart toward peace instead of disruptive performance. Teaching them to quietly whisper “Bismillah” or to take deep breaths while consciously remembering Allah Almighty transforms self-regulation into spiritual regulation. 

Prophetic Example 

It is recorded in Sahih Muslim, Hadith 2321, that the holy Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, said: 

‘The strong one is not the one who overcomes people by his strength, but the strong one is he who controls himself while in anger.’ 

This Hadith perfectly parallels the management of sensory overwhelm. True strength is found in mastering one’s own reaction. Teaching your child to pause, breathe, or step away when they feel overstimulated is actively training them in jihad al-nafs—the striving of the self. This empowers them to seek dignity over drama. 

Turning Overwhelm into Worship 

When overload strikes, whisper with them: ‘O Allah, place peace in my heart.’ Sit together for a few deliberate, deep breaths, purposefully linking calmness to the act of remembrance. Later, reflect kindly: ‘Even when things felt noisy inside you, you chose calm—that pleases Allah Almighty.’ Over time, these micro-moments of self-restraint and reflection become acts of ihsan—doing what is beautiful and excellent for the sake of Allah Almighty. 

By consistently meeting chaos with composure, you model divine mercy in human form. You teach your child that calm is not the absence of sound but the presence of peace—a peace that begins within and radiates outward, guided by love, faith, and the remembrance of Allah Almighty.