Parenting Perspective 

Many parents find themselves locked in the same frustrating cycle: the child avoids chores all day, only to face them at bedtime when everyone is tired and tempers are frayed. Tears, arguments, and guilt often follow. Understanding this cycle requires looking beneath the surface of behaviour into the psychology of avoidance. 

Procrastination and Overwhelm 

Children often push chores aside because they seem dull or endless compared to play, screens, or relaxation. To a young mind, postponing offers short-term relief, even if it creates bigger problems later. Bedtime becomes the last possible moment, and when exhaustion collides with unfinished tasks, tears naturally flow. The issue is less laziness and more difficulty managing time and emotions. 

Chores as Looming Clouds 

For some children, the very thought of a chore hanging over them feels like a heavy cloud. They distract themselves until it cannot be ignored. Parents may see this as defiance, but it is often avoidance rooted in anxiety: ‘If I delay it, maybe it will feel easier later.’ Unfortunately, later is when their energy is lowest. 

Emotional Weight of Bedtime Battles 

When chores are left until the night, bedtime loses its calm, comforting rhythm. Instead of winding down, the child feels pressured and upset. The tears are not only about the chore itself but about the clash between exhaustion, guilt, and parental frustration. This cycle, if repeated, teaches the child to associate responsibility with stress rather than growth. 

Shifting the Pattern 

Parents can break the cycle by anchoring chores earlier in the day. A visual schedule, reminders tied to natural breaks (like after a meal), or setting a ‘chore window’ in the afternoon helps create consistency. Even more powerful is connecting chores to pride rather than punishment. Saying, ‘Once you finish tidying your room, you will have the whole evening free to enjoy,’ reframes the task as liberation rather than burden. 

A Micro-Action to Try 

Introduce a five-minute ‘quick start’ rule: when a chore feels heavy, encourage your child to spend just five minutes beginning it. Often, starting is the hardest part, and once momentum builds, they find it easier to finish. 

Spiritual Insight 

Islam teaches balance in life: time is a trust, and managing it wisely is part of responsibility. Leaving tasks until the last moment is not only stressful but also diminishes the dignity of work well done. Training children to approach chores early nurtures discipline, which carries into every sphere of adulthood. 

Allah Almighty states in the noble Quran at Surah Al Asr (103), Verses 1-3: 

‘By the (design of) time (by Allah Almighty); indeed, mankind shall surely (remain in a state of) deprivation (moral deficit), except for those people who are believers and undertake virtuous acts; and encouraging (cultivating within themselves and with one another the realisation and dissemination of) the truth and encouraging (cultivating within themselves and with one another the realisation and accomplishment of) resilience.’ 

This powerful reminder shows that time, once lost, cannot be recovered. Teaching children to value their hours—by finishing chores before they become burdensome, helps them step into the group who use time wisely. 

It is recorded in 40 Hadith Al Nawawi, Hadith 40, that the holy Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: 

In the evening do not expect [to live until] the morning, and in the morning do not expect [to live until] the evening. Take [advantage of] your health before times of sickness, and [take advantage of] your life before your death. 

This Hadith teaches the value of acting in the moment rather than delaying until circumstances make it harder. When children learn to complete their chores earlier, they practise the discipline of seizing time before it slips away. 

By guiding children gently towards timely action, parents shift chores from late-night battles into opportunities for growth and balance. Over time, the lesson is not just about a tidy room but about living with foresight, calm, and dignity.